Where did my life go

Did I even have a life? I didn't even like brow. I didn't like my housemates, I didn't really like Cecily either.  I want to make my own music in my new house with a cathedral roof. I want to start my own business. I have the skills required. I could do this is another country but I have so many great contacts here.

Why don't they talk to me

I don't know... I'm a nice, fun, interesting guy. Only takes 5 seconds to reply. Maybe they just don't use Facebook chat often and forget. Maybe people are worried they'll grow to really like me and then I'll ignore them. I wouldn't do that. I still talk to all my friends, they just don't talk to me. It's sad. Oh well, there are plenty others that will talk to me, I can't be loved by everyone. I'll show them all what they're missing.

Albany with bare feet

Today I'm driving to Albany with a band to play trumpet with them. I don't know what to say. I know what I want to say, but I fear that they'll somehow find this post. That's extremely unlikely. I'll rename the post to be sure. Albany is a depressing place. There's nothing there. It's cold, windy,  isolated. This band needs a lot of work, lots of rehearsal time, especially with their new drummer.

New drummer sounded good. They all sounded good. Just the song writing is a bit lame.

It's quite nice here... Too many flies though. Here are some pictures.

Goa

So before I go I want to experience as many of the local escorts as I fancy. Today my twitter account suggested a page called goa escorts. Where is goa?  I wondered... It's in India! It looks like the perfect place to travel, cheap, hot, humid, and good escorts.

With the Beatles

Speed Dating

Last night i went speed dating with a few old friends from high school. I hadn't spoken to them for years, until earlier this year when I met Jurek on the bus home from work. This is work that Cecil'y step mum found for me. It's interesting how life works out sometimes. I'm unsure if these friends are good for me. They are certainly fun, and they believe in me, which helps with my moral, but I have to learn to not over indulge, and keep at the task at hand. The tasks at hand have gone off the rails these last few weeks. I have wasted a lot of time, and my schedule has been repeatedly pushed back. This is severely disappointing. I'll aim now to have the house read for tenants by the end of November. Speed dating for good to try once, but I wouldn't want to do it again. The girls were much more picky than I expected. I expected the girls to be those who struggled to meet guys due to not being so desirable, but they were very desirable women, who really valued their time and didn't want to waste time going out to find men; speed dating was a much more time efficient option. I went with 3 friends, none of us had any matches. There were 15 girls and 15 guys.

Slacking off feels good

So the last couple of weeks I've slacked off a lot. I can't even remember what I did last week. I got sun burnt at the park, and played Minecraft a few times with the Pusheen guys. I painted the living room? I think that was last week. The main l house should be done by now. Wait a sec... For every week later that I get tenants in, I'm losing $200! This is bog, I had not considered this. I should start spending to save time.

Health

I'm worried about my health. I don't feel well. Probably just because of my strange sleep pattern I had yesterday, and all the paint I inhaled. I will wear a mask from now on. Soon I can leave and won't have to come back. House is looking better with each thing I do.

Haircut

Today im at my sisters house. She cut my hair for me. Very nice of her, and she's done a great job. Yesterday I started painting the house. Hopefully in a week it'll be ready for tenants, but could be a stretch though, there's a lot of work still to be done. Spend money to save time, I will make it all back and much more. Call people and ask things. The frame is on great shape even after 50 years and should be good for another 50.

Too loud

Where to start. I don't want to lose my hearing, so I walked out. I already know all these songs... How can anyone hear what is going on when everything is so loud. Why was I even invited to this rehearsal.

On a more positive note, its really nice here. Nice and clean and grassy green, wide open spaces. Nobody is here though, feels kind of lonely. I have the world wide web of people to keep me company :)

Soccer at the park

Soccer today was really fun. On Saturday I'm gonna be part of the crew :)

I've been very distracted by band and social things. These are not important. What's important is that I work on the house, build the new house, and develop a consistent trade record and/or invest in other great traders.

Then I can meet new and better friends in magical places far away, experiencing all of life's thrills and wonders, foods and people, forever, and beat the longevity escape velocity.

Motivation

I am lacking motivation again... I don't feel like doing anything. I should read my earlier posts on motivation. I know if I shower I will feel better and more like doing things. What to do.... For now I will just sit here and think about how I'm feeling and how I could feel better, think about things I'd like, people I'd like.

Earlier posts, goals docs, and family photos have helped somewhat with my motivation. I am doing some PC organisation now. I shouldn't force myself into doing things though, that will just make me resent it. I should stop everything I'm doing and just give my mind time to think freely and it will will organise its thoughts and decide on what it wants and why, and be excited to do things, because I am free to do whatever I want. 

Tv shows

I fell asleep this afternoon when I got home from from recording. Woke up at 9pm, now it's 1am and I still feel wide awake. Tomorrow I will wake up at 7:30 and stay awake all day to get my sleep pattern back in shape. I've been watching Brooklyn 99. Jt recommended it.

Name of my band

I'll use this post to brainstorm band names.

Ideas:

Grey scale
Black and white train
1973
1967
Colours before film
Yesterday's jam
Pictures of trains
Railroad
Side project 2
clearing in the woods
Memories of colour
Coloured dreams

The name isn't so important. What's more important is that members have conviction and confidence in the name of their band. These feelings will then shine through the music, and overtime people will relate the name to the good music.

Magic Island

My urge to design and build audio gear is strong today. I want my own place where the air and food are fresh, where I can design/build/fix audio gear, record music with friends, and have friends over. My friends from home could fly over and visit me. I could have cheap massages, meet travelling tourists. Perhaps I could do all of that here, in my new house.

Remembering people

I have more friends than i can remember.. people say hi to me and i can't remember their names, their faces smiling, i would have made them smile once upon a time, we would have shared a moment or three, but now they are nothing more than a faded memory.

I must be a very memorable Sky.

More recording.....

I wanted to see my mum and sister for a haircut today but I was needed for more recording. I'm so sleepy. I think my cough has gone now which is nice. I think my brain needs some off time. I shall give it that now

Loneliness, people, plans

Hi again,

More recording today, then dinner and movies with friends, then home sweet home. I went to facebook to check the spelling of Renae's name and again got distracted by a video of peppermint club jamming before our single launch. She liked how i repeated vowels when i typed words words. For example: "yeah it was goood".

Kristy just reminded me why I stopped talking to her, she's a pessimistic cynical idiot, who will forever retard herself further with her attitudes and lifestyles. Caring only makes me sad. I am strong, but bearing her is a lot of work that energy could be put to much better use.

So today i felt a little lonely, not being able to relate with people, talk to the people i wanted to. This doesn't matter. I will focus on the big picture. These short term issues are just distractions and obstacles. $600 a week from the house, passive investments, travel, worldwide cuisine, document my journeys, and profit from the documentation, then setup somewhere with fresh air and food to do business and record my album. I will have all the ladies i could ever want, i just have to stay focused, stay psychologically strong, and not get distracted by music and people.

I have been putting a lot of time into music and people this last couple of weeks, but with thomas and ellen going away for several months, that will give me plenty of time to fix up this house, sort the pc, build the new house, and get a good track record as a possible bonus. I could even splash out on ladies. I should try that, just to tick off the bucket list and confirm it as a goal. Just because it's bad once doesn't mean it will always be. My passive investments haven't done so well this last month, stay strong Sky, they will bounce back.

Why do I keep checking faceobook. I am giving into my emotions. Stick with the plan. The plan is good, it was made be me, I am wise. I can get this house finished before my next birthday, then begin endless travels.

I can meet people, I can show them whoever I want them to see, I can be whoever i want to be in their eyes, splashing out on gifts, rides, cash, food, drinks, fancy hotels. This song is so great. I'm in a poor state of mind now, I've forgotten what i wanted to write about. I can get out of this. It is late, perhaps it is best i just go to sleep. I'm having fun though. There were more things I wanted to talk about...

My views on Maisie are weird. I'd like to stay more relaxed and confident in who i am in social situations. I don't need to try to be happy/enthused, i can just portray my confidence in a relaxed fashion. Just remember who you are Sky, and things will go well.

Mineral water and lemon wedge

Oh my god, they gave me a mineral water with a lemon wedge. All the places I've played over the years and nobody has had mineral water. I feel like I'm being caressed by a sexy sensual women. This glass of mineral water has made my night. Now if only it was socially acceptable to take out my penis and start pleasuring myself.

Gold champagne + ef recording

I don't know where I am. I feel sick. I fucking hate grilld. Why is food in Perth so bad? Because people keep buying it. People are idiots. I'm just feeling angry because I feel sick. Everything comes back to physiological.

This place would be nice if it wasn't for the terrible hip hop music.

Yesterday I went to matt gios place to record keys for ensemble formidable. They changed their name to brassika, which I don't like. Only because its vegetable related, and the main reason they wanted to change name is so they weren't confused with formidable vegetable sound system. Matt Gio was only their briefly, we recorded with a guy called Dan. He had apparently been talking to James about me and how I liked the trampoline. James is the guy we recorded with down south. Everyone knows everyone in Perth. Me and Maisie had a nice chat while we were walking to get lunch. She really liked the piano I did for funky Romain. I came up with it on the spot, I usually play trumpet in that song. The piano was opened up and a ribbon mic was used. I should have asked about the preamp. The builtin pro tools organ sounded really cool.

I'm gonna forget a lot of stuff, but that's okay. I can remember it more interestingly than how it really happened. Wave rock is already such a blur, and it was one of the most amazing times of my life. I think I would have written a lot about it at the time. I've probably forgotten a lot of the things I wrote about. I know what I want to do now, I have a plan that I have consistent confidence in, so now I can make my brain super efficient, only keeping the necessary memories. But before I do that, I should document as many of the important events of my life as I can, copy all the photos from Facebook, they are not completely safe. And from now on, I will document things as I go, because there are a lot of good times still to be had. I am smarter, more skillful, and more charismatic than ever before. I just need the right people around me in the roght places to create fulfilling life experiences.

Back to the post title. Tonight is the gold champagne single launch. These pants are quite nice. I'm not overly happy with some of my keyboard tones, oh well, they'll get better. I'm.excited to do 2nd guitar. I left the group and came here to sulk about my awful meal and self reflect and get some exercise. I need a soda. I'll see of this place does mineral water. They seem like fun people. I should go and spice up their conversation, they talk about such boring things like work and marriage. I'll talk about zuchinni that plays back gammon and when I shagged a Swedish spy while fighting in nam.

Never ever eat at grilld ever again

Always always disappointing

Good plans + Fun times with old friends

Today the asbestos was removed from the back room. I have been organising my things, moving everything i on' want into the front room.

I will leave my tools in the back room temporarily while i install the walls. Then i'll need to find a good place for them. I should put them in a cupboard where they're not an eye sore. Then I can put them in the back corridor.

I can still make my original deadlines :) with a loooot of work this week. Gotta start my moving everything i don't want into the front room, look into record 2nd hand record stores, gyprock, trimming (including laundry), sanding, gap filling, painting, ceiling plastic, oven.

Back to the title of the post: I'm planning a party to see all my old friends. I have a lot of old friends i'd like to patch things up with, but more so just see again. I will have it once the main house is done. I'm thinking of having a garage sale before then as well, to get rid of my things. Will be on a sunday. Then I'll build the house out back, and have a big going away thing once that's done.

I'm thinking it'd be weird living with the people that pay me rent. So i might rent somewhere else and rent out this entire house. It'll be nice living somewhere else, and i can come check in here. That will be once the house is built out back. Then once i'm feeling confident with the tenants, i can travel. I can get some temporary people/friends in while i build the back house for the extra cash.

Ideas while trying to sleep

Fix speakers with tweeters. I can do the sewer line myself, and pay to have the gas done. Wall ceiling edge is called a cornice. Each power point is 10 amps, I can run 2 lines to the new house, one for lights and one for outlets, and meter them both. Gas outlets for heating, hot water, and kitchen.

Mastering People

I understand people so well now, and myself. I feel more confident interacting with others than ever before. I should go into details to remind myself for later. Try and look good, but don't stress over it once I'm out, just relax and be happy with who I am and how I look. I have confidence in who I am as a person. I put myself in the shoes of others. I know what people want to hear and can provide that. I am funny. I get familiar with unfamiliar people, and make them familiar with me so we can feel comfortable together, relax together. I can read people better than ever before, i know what to ask to really understand how they tick and the reasoning behind their decisions.

Mojo's markets

Today I finally made it to Mojo's markets, after all these years of attempting to go, but never waking up in time.

I met with marina, Amelia, her boyfriend, and a couple of other girls, 1 which I knew but couldn't remember her name or where I knew her, and another who I'd never met, her name was jasmine. This is like a strange dream. I've finally made it to Mojo's markets.  Its very surreal. That might just be the alcohol still I'm my system from last night and the iced coffee from just now. There are very few guys here, its almost all young attractive women.

Big night

Tonight I had a gig with peppermint club at Jimmy's den in north bridge. I got some sexy compliments. Tim and meg are cool :) tim wants me to play some trumpet for peppermint. He thought the brass was the best part of brow. Afterwards i went to zanes house warming party in maylands. Cindy, charlie, paul Melville, Chiara, Chris, Tim, and jess were there. Then I went to Phil's house warming. I spoke to some people on the train on the way there. I didn't arrive until 1am and there were only 4 people left; tom pow, keiren and his friend and a fat girl who said she was banging nic Owen but ended up in bed with tom pow.  Phil got on the train as I got off.

Shooting hoops

Today I took a basketball to the park with me and shot hoops. I made 40/100 from the free throw line. I'll see if I improve next time. Lots of sun, lots of exercise. Definitely worth the $20 for the ball.

I have been sick this week and have fallen behind schedule. I am going well enough now to work so I should adjust my milestone dates and resume working again 8 to 5. PC org is almost finished. Asbestos guy is coming monday so over the weekend I need to get cash out and clear out the back rooms. Then next week I can do the backroom.

I'm pleased with how much I've remembered from trading last year. I could be a great trader :) just need to consistently put in the work

Progress

I had a good trade week this week. First week back and trading. I also made a lot of progress organising my PC. Next week I will begin the renovations. Everything is planned out nicely. Today I got a blender and sandwich maker for the kitchen, some new drinking glasses, and a nice new towel.

I need to plan a way to increase my trade sizes as my as my positive track record continues. I'm thinking every two months I will move to the next fib number, until I reach the total value of my investments (currently about 45k), IF the two months are profitable. If not, I will go to the previous fib number. So I will go: 1 2 3 5 8 12 20 32 52.. That will take me 18 months. It is tempting to ramp up faster, but I'm only going to get better with more practice. Perhaps every month would be okay? Then I'll be up to my total in ~9 months. That's still a decently long track record. 

Piano moving

Today I helped Chen move a piano from his ex girlfriend's house to his house. She recognised me and saod hi but i dodnt know where id seen her from until I asked Chen. She used to come to brow shows while Chen was playing.  I have a gig with ensemble tonight but I am not feeling so well. I suspect it was the hamburger, too much energy for my body to break down then my immune system had less energy to fight off this flu. Meg and Tim live around the corner from Chen, they are good friends of his and manage his band, that I also play in. Attached are some pictures of the van we used to move the piano.

Motivation

It's really nice here. In my room, lying in my cloud staring bit the window, wide world of people and entertainment and knowledge to explore from under the covers. It can be hard to find the motivation to aim for anything more.

This week I have found motivation by listening to my music, and how great it would be to have my own studio with decent gear, where I can make music all day long. Imagine that in a nice warm humid climate where the air and food are fresh.  Listening to myself sing, drum and play guitar, this motivates me :)

Big plans

Today is Friday, last day of my first week working at home. It's been a good week, but i can make future weeks even better. I've got my PC working really well. Trade account working, and a nice organised system and schedule for working at home. Escorts are illegal in all of the USA except Nevada. This is disappointing. However, sperm donors can earn up to $1500 a month! This would cover all my travel expenses, but I need to be able to legally work there, more research needed on how to do that.

I haven't been doing my 1 hour of blogging per day. I can start that tomorrow.

Planning the holiday is taking more time than expected. Should be fun though. From there I can calculate how much income I need. I should build the house regardless, its guaranteed income. Should only take 6 months, then I'll have an extra $300 per week for travelling.

I should start setting some deadlines. They work. By end of the weekend I'll have my travel calcs done, then next week I can begin working on house, blogging, PC organisation, trading, donating, gardening.

Skyday

So last day of recording has been labelled skyday where I get to experiment with keys parts and other miscellaneous overdubs.

Xylophone
Piano
Rhodes
Whistle

Recording down south

So this week I am recording down south with the band. It is really nice down here. I hope there's as much rain up in Perth. My plants will be doing well. The guy has a nice setup down her. Its a big plot of land south of bunbury with a house in the middle of it. Its on the highway so there's a bit of traffic noise. Always there in the distance... Theres 1 room seperate to the house where things are recorded with a 2 way video and audio feed to a room in the house with the recording PC and rack mount gear. The fresh air is nice, but it is still too dry for my liking. I still wake up with a sore throat. The wide open spaces outside are nice. I like to jump on the trampoline, but its raining at the moment.

The next phase

The next phase is here. Its time to donate and blog world wide. $600 a week plus $100 per week investments plus $500 a per week trading... 1200/week! Then I can really travel in style. Could just do $300 / week for the house at first. I will make calls and look into the 2nd house. I've just woken up. Sunday morning. I should do a blog post for holiday planning. Its raining and pretty outside

Walk to bus stop

This is the view i saw every morning on my way to work, knowing a long day was ahead of me. Thankfully I won't need to see it anymore I'm that context. From now on, I'm walking, ubering, getting a lift, or hiring a car.  I am working my way up in the world

Ego

I am a very good looking guy, very smart, very talented. It's a lot of fun, but means nothing without application.

Cecily

So Cecily doesn't wanna hang out anymore. I think the only reason I wanted to hang out with her is because I want to feel loved. She never has many interesting things to say, or interesting point of views, or ambitions... She just horded a lot of junk and vomited from alcohol poisoning. Its very sad :( I could have really helped her if I'd taken the time to listen and put effort into her. But i was too busy with work, too tired on weekends... She couldn't really be helped anyway, she would react negatively to any advice by drinking even more.. But I at least wanted to try. If anyone could help her, its me. I want to show her my videos. I should do an entry on the wedding, if I haven't already. I have improved so much these last few years. I am stronger and smarter than ever, and there's no signs of plateauing.

Tidying

House is looking progressively better. It'll only get better from here.

The florist

Today I was talking to carji about the imaginary place I go called the florist. He really likes the idea and thinks I should make it a real place. Bean bags, books, flowers, tea and coffee, late nights, mood lighting, and of course flowers.

Last day of work, extra storage, hot tub

So I'm on the bus on my last day of work. HR still hasn't contacted me to confirm it's my last day. Slackers. If I'm still here when my work for the dole resumes then I'll get another job. Maybe even before then if I am missing work. I could build a storage box under the house, or just get a large box. I think a large wooden/metal box would be cheap and easy to make.

For the hot tub, I could just have a paddle pool on the back porch, then I could take it down when I wasn't using it. Wouldn't look as nice as a permanent masonry construction.

Today I need to:
Film office
Photos of desk
Ask for reference
Get things from desk

Ice cream girl + doomsday prediction

Today is wednesday, 21st of september 2016. My 3rd last day of work. I went and got icecream after i had lunch at the loving hut. The icecream girl looked very happy to see me. I regularly got icecream at that same place, cafe gelato, after lunch during lunch break at work. I get the coffee in a cup, single scoop. Coffee to wake me up from my after lunch sleeinesss, single scoop because too many carbs overworks the body, and cup so i can eat it with a spooon.

I just had another idea. The doomsday argument. There have been ~ 100 billion humans that have lived on earth so far, so if the total number of humans to ever live was 200 billion, then there would be a 50% chance that any particular human is born in the first 100 billion people. However, if the total number of humans to ever live is much larger, say 100 trillion, then there is a tiny chance that any human born would be in the first 100 billion. I have to queries with this argument. Firstly, there was never really a first human to be born... humans gradually evolved from other organisms over millions of years. So should we count the total number of living things instead? That number would be insanely big, and we have no way of accurately estimating it, to my knowledge. But i guess you could just draw the line somewhere and say "this is the first human", then the doomsday argument still makes sense. However by that logic, you could then define any group (of people) in the same way... Take the total number of cars ever made, see where your car ranks, and get an idea of how likely it is that you are driving the first of so many cars.  My second query; What if at some stage humans discover how to live forever, then the world reaches the maximum number of people it can feed, so people have to stop reproducing... nobody knew is born. In terms of the doomsday argument, this would be the equivalent of an extinction. However, new people will still be born due to death by accidents, murders, and disease. The estimated maximum sustainable population is estimated to be about 11 billion. The UN estimates it'll reach this around 2050-2070, let this be MP. In 2050 I'll turn 61 years old. Today, there are ~130 million births per year, so by 2050, ~4.4 billion more people will have existed, adding to the 100 billion that have existed already. Let the year that aging is cured be TI. It is assumed that TI is after the world population maxes out. Between MP and TI, new people will be born at the rate that they die. Today, ~0.7% of the world population dies each year. At 11 billion, this will be ~77 million deaths per year, therefore 77 million births per year. in 2001, there were 31 million preventable deaths. That was 0.5% of the population. If this percentage was the same after TI, then there would be 55 million new people per year after TI. However this percentage is expected to decrease as civilization improves. I can find the trend that it is decreasing, and extrapolate to 0%, to calculate the total number of humans that will be born after TI. Then i can calculate when TI would be such that the number of people born before or after me is equal!! Thus I would have an expected value for TI.

Last week of work

So i have gotten ahead with my work today, so i thought i'd write in my blog. I have been talking a lot at work with my friends from high school. They recommended a podcast called grandmas virginity, i am listening to it now. It is a good thing to do at work because it's entertaining but it still looks like i am working. We talk about a lot of interesting things in facebook chat. Today I was explaining global economics, QE, inflation, central banks, and investing in bonds and currencies. Understanding these things is key for getting your money to work for you. Apparently the japanese are not reproducing.. It's becoming a problem. I have money in a global bonds investment fund, which lots 1% over the last week, i was curious as to why, and apparently the sell off in bonds was triggered by the ECB when they didn't expand their QE program as expected. I was also telling my friends about the tinder dates I've been on. The one with the large girl that looked thin in her photos, then while we were in the city she ordered deep fried sushi. The other, there were problems in the bedroom.

Plan

Nobody can remember everything worth remembering, but this blog can. I want something to remind myself of all the great things I've done, and who i am. With this blog, I can remember anything I want. The aim of this blog is to document events of my life. Many events have already been documented in other formats, but I have come to the conclusion that this is the best option. Existing documentation will be re-posted here. Here I can combine text, photos, videos and music (via YouTube's unlimited uploads). Information here is easily searchable, safe and secure (as opposed to on my hard drives, which are likely to malfunction). Date's of posts can be set to the actual date that they were written, rather than the date it was posted here. I'm contemplating using different names, to protect the identity of those in my entries.